Where do I start….. Well, let’s start from the beginning. It was about 8 years ago, when I met my husband. We played volleyball with the same group of friends and soon started dating ourselves. We like most people, went back and forth, he had an on again, off again relationship and so did I. But somehow we always ended up back together. I became pregnant on an Oh My Gosh, what do I do. I ended up being the bad person here and I pushed him away, afraid of losing control, wondering who would be around my child, etc if for some reason we did not work out. FEAR, it can make you do silly things.
He was absent for about 4 years, then we randomly connected again on Facebook. It was like nothing ever happened. It was awesome, he was always someone who I felt I could be myself around and never had to try to be anyone else. It was so easy with him. He was living in Washington at the time we reconnected and we decided to make this family thing happen and he transferred out to Phoenix for work and it has been awesome ever since!
Then the BEST thing happened, I become pregnant again just this March. We were excited, we get to do this right and he gets to be a part of everything. I could not be happier.
Since, I am of advanced maternal age (I am only 36 mind you), I had to have some extra ultrasounds for early detection of genetic disorders. We had our first ultrasound done in May and everything looked great! There were no signs of any genetic disorders and the baby was growing perfectly. Our next ultrasound was scheduled for July, and at that time we would find out boy or girl. I was hoping for a boy, as everyone else wanted a girl.
So here we are at our ultrasound on July 17, 2017. The good news, IT’S A BOY!!!!, Then comes the doctor after having had the ultrasound for over an hour now, since this lil guy likes to move around. The comes in and informs me that they are having difficulty seeing the heart perfectly and that the left side of the heart is looking smaller than the right.
WHAT!!!! NO!!!! These were the thoughts that went immediately through my head. I happen to have a friend who’s son has Hypo-plastic Left Heart Syndrome and I know that he has had open heart surgeries since he was born. I am secretly FREAKING OUT, right now. They inform me that they want to get confirmation from a specialist, a Pediatric Cardiologist. Oh, no.
I do not get an appointment for a couple of weeks. So, now it is sit and wait….. and wait….. and wait……